oh i’m on the drinking man’s diet
it came from a book i was loaned
it’s really terrific and quite scientific
and i’m half stoned
for breakfast some cornflakes and vodka
but cornflakes have carbohydrate
so i don’t eat those fattening cornflakes
i eat the vodka straight
drink drink everyone drink
it’s not as bad as we used to think
with every manhattan your stomach will flatten
so drink drink drink
the air force invented this diet
a fact which they hotly deny
of course they deny it ’cause this is the diet
that got the air force high
for lunch you can have three martinis
what better lunch is there than that
but caution do not eat the olives
’cause olives make you fat
drink drink everyone drink
it’s not as bad as we used to think
if pounds you would burn off then turn on your smirnoff
and drink drink drink
for dinner a nice scotch and soda
now that oughtta help you to lose
no whipped cream no butter just lay in the gutter
and booze booze booze
suppose you should meet a policeman
who says you’ve been quenching your thirst
you just tell him it’s physical fitness
and health comes first
drink hic drink hic booze everywhere hic
pass that decanter of bourbon there
i’m fatter than ever but here’s what’s so clever
i don’t care
Artist: Allan Sherman
Year: 1965
Decade: 60s
Language: en
Word Count: 126