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Once An Addict (Interlude) Lyrics By J Cole

    right right right right
    something’s got a hold on me
    right right right right
    sometimes i think pain is just a lack of understanding
    if we could only understand it all would we feel no pain
    god must feel no pain
    something’s got a hold on me
    only joy
    does this mean even our suffering pleases him

    verse
    lost in a cloud of marijuana
    young carolina nigga fish out of water
    stepdaddy just had a daughter with another woman
    mama ain’t recover yet
    callin’ me at at night
    she drunk as fuck and i’m upset
    ’cause why she always using me for crutch
    growin’ up i used to always see her up
    late as shit cigarette smoke and greatest hits from marvin gaye
    she kill a whole bottle of some cheap chardonnay
    i gotta leave this house ’cause part of me dies when i see her like this
    too young to deal with pain
    i’d rather run the streets than see her kill herself
    so ‘ville became my escape from a feelin’ i hate
    mama cursing me out
    depression’s such a villainous state
    i used to stay out later on purpose
    subconsciously i was nervous that if i came home early then what would surface was her inner demons
    and then i’d have to end up seein’ my hero on ground zero
    tears flow while al green blow
    love and happiness
    i wish that i could say the right words to cheer her up
    i wish her son’s love was enough
    i tell her mama go to sleep
    she tell me boy hush you better pray to god you never get your heart crushed
    i shake my head in frustration
    head to my room and i can still hear the tunes with my door shut
    fuck it though a couple more months i’ll be gone
    off to college and dorms
    foolin’ myself thinkin’ problems are gone
    but now it’s am and my mama dialin’ my phone
    i know she intoxicated and soon this high that i’m on comes crashin’ down
    she lit talkin’ drunk shit i’m pissed
    but i’m still all ears like basset hounds
    thinkin’ to myself maybe my mama need help
    don’t she got work in the morning
    why she do this to herself
    hate how she slurrin’ her words
    soundin’ so fuckin’ absurd
    this ain’t the woman i know why i just sit and observe
    why don’t i say how i feel
    when i do she’s defensive for real
    well maybe things get better with time i heard it heals
    little did i know how deep her sadness would go
    lookin’ back i wish i woulda did more instead of runnin’

    something’s got a hold on me
    i can’t let it go
    out of fear i won’t be free
    something’s got a hold on me
    i can’t let it go
    out of fear i won’t be
    no
    something’s got a hold on me
    i can’t let it go
    right
    life can bring much pain
    there are many ways to deal with this pain right
    choose wisely right

    Artist: J Cole

    Year: 2018

    Decade: 10s

    Language: en

    Word Count: 275